Tag Archives: humour

Pain

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Unwanted Advice

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I am sure that everybody reading this blog has been confronted with unwanted (often very stupid) advice, kind of like in Chronic Illness Bingo. Probably well meant by whoever says these things, but utterly annoying for us. I think it is a basic human nature to want to help, even if it is with useless information, tips and advice. (Healthy) people often feel confronted when they meet someone with a disability or chronic illness. They feel helpless, do not know what to say and want to be nice. They do not realise that what they say has been said by countless other people before!

I always try to stay calm and friendly (even though I’m boiling inside from frustration) and try to explain things in a manner that is not too extremely medically difficult to understand. Depending on what illness/disability you have you can find information on support websites that you might be able to use for explaining things. For example, I have Elher-Danlos Syndrome and I say ‘I have a connective tissue disorder’, that is an extremely simplified way of explaining but it does the job. If people want to know more I will give them more details on why that makes me so ill.  Whatever your illness or disability is, there is a way of simplifying things that even the most stupid people will understand. Generally that will stop the unwanted advice.